i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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