I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
