It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
nutella sex= disaster
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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