dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
