If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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