I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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