there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
