Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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