I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
