He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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