Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
