I wanna bring you to show and tell
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
