Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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