very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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