the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
