She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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