just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
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