Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
