You're my little dorito
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
