Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Duck Duck Cougar?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
