Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
