apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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