Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
