lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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