Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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