I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
