It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
