i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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