In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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