This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
