im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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