We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
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