So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
They have beer where we have blood.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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