Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
