I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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