he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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