What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
