Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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