That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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