so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
