just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Randomize
