He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
