Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
My first STD was from a foam party
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
