if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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