he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
ok first of all what the fuck
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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