I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I am one with the molecules
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
You ate ashes out of my bong
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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