I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
