I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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