If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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