Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
i now understand why vodka
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
