Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
